There is glitter on my fingertips,
As they stroke across the page,
Its all black and red to you,
But I see it glimmer and form.
She didn't have to make that joke,
As it cut into my trusting heart,
Black, yes, everything is black,
This is why I stay silent.
That was a secret she laughed about.
And you laughed too,
"I'm used to it."
He won't leave my dreams,
And I can never sleep.
Lets wash this blood red marker,
away in the sink.
This is why I am insomniac.
The bullet noise forever imprinted in my mind.
You just smile,
"Well, he's in a better place now."
She never had to use my life against me,
Those low blows don't bring her above me.
Shade and shade until the right hue is made.
This is why I stay in my room,
Hide away in a book,
I hate being a disappointment to her.
But you, "She's not so bad."
It doesn't ever stop calling to me,
That little tiny object,
But self-destruction has torn us apart.
This is why you are no longer apart of me.
Lets erase this dark line away.
The mirror is distorted,
That might have something to do with me,
But you are beautiful, yes, but not me.
Oh, the black smudged into the red,
Let's just smudge it all.
If only they loved each other,
I wish he would stop using,
Find a job, a home, and stop nearly dying,
Its a horrible mistake!
I hate it all! ERASE ERASE ERASE!!
Maybe it wasn't as bad as I think,
But I didn't agree,
It was his choice, maybe I am just weak.
I am weak,
Here's a pencil, lets fix this mess.
She's slipping away everyday,
Why isn't there some way,
Soon she will forget my name,
Lie in a hospital bed and say,
"What a beautiful daughter I have."
But I am your grandchild...
This ink will swirl around the page.
I stare at him,
He's all from the original story I have left.
This drawing is mine. This drawing is partially his.
Bound by blood, little brother is my solid ground.
This drawing is my story.
No one understands it, and neither do you,
But I do, I am not the mask.
We didn't create this, I did.
This is why you don't see the glitter on the page.
Every drawing is my pain.
This is how my art is made.